Thursday, December 9, 2010

Rockin' Chicken Parm

Because I have so many friends who cook, I've gotten TONS of ridicule over my learning such a basic principle of cooking that you add seasoning while you cook. A friend of mine (a gorgeous little hottie named Jesca) started a recipes blog called Rockin' Recipes, and gave me permission to post one of her recipes here. Granted, I did re-write it for men since, let's face it guys, we can be food prep-challenged. Click here for the original un-edited recipe.

NOTE: If you are planning on using this recipe as part of a pre-meditated seduction, please make sure that your target is:
  • A) Not a Vegetarian, and
  • B) Not lactose-intolerant
Believe you me, the night will go a lot more smoothly if you have those facts ahead of time! And here's the Male version of Rockin' Recipe's Chicken Parmesan:
Your Weaponry:
3 Bowls
2 Sheets of Wax Paper
1 Baking Dish (A Cookie Sheet can be substituted)
1 Skillet
1 Stove with Oven

Your Ammunition:
4 Boneless & Skinless Chicken Breasts
2 Large Eggs
1 Cup Vegetable Oil
1 Cup Italian Seasoned Bread Crumbs
1 Cup Flour
1 pkg Shredded Mozzarella Cheese

A large amount of Pasta Sauce (your preference)
Some flour for dusting (your preference)
Some butter or margarine for greasing (your preference)

Battle Prep:
- Fill the bowls:
-- Bowl 1: Flour
-- Bowl 2: Eggs beaten within an inch of their lives
-- Bowl 3: Bread Crumbs (Optional: Add salt & pepper to taste.)

- Grease the Baking dish with your choice of butter

Battle Plan:

Stage 1:
On a stove top place oil in skillet and let heat. Pre-heat oven to 350 degrees.

By this point, the chicken breasts have been making smart ass remarks, so you take each one and place it in between the two sheets of wax paper and beat the wiseass out of them! When they are about a quarter of an inch thick, they've learned their lesson.

Take one of the newly schooled chicken breast and pat it (on BOTH sides) in the flour. This dries the skin and allows the egg to stick a little better. Next, dip it in the egg.

Order some of the expendable crumbs to jump into the oil and test if it's ready. If the oil bubbles around them, it's time for stage 2.

Stage 2:
Take the chicken breast and dip both sides in the final bowl with bread crumbs. When the meat has a solid shield around it, transfer it to the hot oil. Cooking the chicken on both sides should take only 2-3 minutes. This is just to solidify the bread crumb shield into it's final golden brown form. While this is cooking, prep the next breast for its time in the oil.

Evac the finished chicken into the greased baking dish and place the next piece of chicken into the oil. keep going until all four have done their duty and are in the baking dish.

Pour a fair amount of your chosen pasta sauce on top. Then bake for 35 min. Then it's time for stage 3.

Stage 3:
At the 35 min mark, add the shredded mozzarella and then bake another 10 min until the cheese is browning. This chicken is now DONE!

Aftermath:
You can serve this with whatever other dishes you wish, or man up and eat it solo! Recommended team mates: Linguine (or any pasta, duh!), or serve on a bed of rice.Other than that, you're on your own for what else you want to serve with it.


NOTE: This recipe has been known to increase attraction and create a great deal of affection for the cook in those who eat it. Be warned: do not, I repeat, DO NOT serve this to someone you don't like!

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